My Humanist Wedding

In 2004 I set about my search for the perfect wedding and instantly hit a problem. My husband and I wanted to get married on Tenby Harbour where we had our first date. There was no compromise.

Two small problems occurred; firstly Tenby Harbour isn’t licensed to take civil ceremonies and secondly neither of us wanted a civil ceremony anyway as we felt there were too many restrictions in the wordings. We wanted a bespoke ceremony that expressed how we truly felt about each other.

I had been married before and my husband had inherited a pot noodle family of three adolescent girls that all wanted to have their say on the day. We had two large families and two circles of friends and Castle Hill , Tenby Harbour was the only fitting venue for a marriage.

After choosing a Humanist Celebrant we both visited her and wrote our own vows to each other, neither of us shared the vows with each other until the day. This gave a lovely surprise and spontaneous feel to the day. Our Celebrant spoke to us both together and then separately to get a 360 degree viewpoint on our beliefs, values and expectations for the future.

Our celebrant shared the framework of the ceremony with us both omitting each other’s vows accordingly so we were able to make changes to the framework together. We wanted a relaxed feel to the wedding and had given the brief to everyone that they were welcome to contribute if they wanted. To our surprise my daughters wrote  a poem to my new husband called ‘Steppy’ and other friends gave speeches and read poems.

Our Celebrant travelled to Tenby with us and delivered the ceremony on a blustery June day that everyone remembers because of its unusual setting and the uniqueness of the words shared.

A Humanist wedding isn’t legally binding at the moment in England and Wales but this was easily remedied. The day before our Humanist ceremony we attended the Registry Office to say two sentences and sign the register. We did not exchange wedding rings at the registry office as this is not a legal requirement. There are only a few words you have to say legally and these are very basic. Some people may not want to do the legalities the day before and may decide to do them on the same day.

We always celebrate the day we had our Humanist wedding as our anniversary as it was exactly 5 years after our first date that we stood on Castle Hill saying our vows to one another.  Our wedding was not only unique but it was relaxed and inclusive, everyone was invited to say what they felt if they wished. We had no time constraints as we weren’t in a place where we had a time slot and in fact we spent most of the afternoon in Tenby before returning to Pontypridd for a large  party.

To veiw our photo album …CLICK HERE