Humanist Ceremonies
Humanism is a simple philosophy of life and ethics based on a concern for humanity and the natural world. Humanists believe in the adage – ‘do as you would be done by’ and look to reason and evidence to understand the universe.
Humanism is a non-religious world view and accepts evolution as the biological origin of all humans. Humanists do not believe in any gods or goddesses, pixies, astrology or even leprechauns.
Science and evidence are the best way to resolve pandemics, excessive global warming, melting ice, rising sea-levels, flooding and wildfires.
Humanism means accepting responsibility for our own lives while recognising our responsibility to the world around us.
HUMANIST CEREMONIES
You may choose a humanist ceremony as a non-religious ceremony because it aligns with your values and beliefs and it means you will able to build the ceremony you want.
It also means the ceremony is entirely personal, and tailor made, to you.
It allows you to be true to yourself while including everyone present and respecting the values and traditions of your families.
Culture
You may define yourself as having a particular cultural background. This might include being Christian, Catholic, Muslim, Jewish, Hindu, Sikh, or Buddhist and whilst aspects of your cultural background may still be significant, the religious element has dwindled and, if asked a direct question, you might consider yourself to be secular or atheist.
If you are now unaffiliated to a particular religion, for the important occasions in life – especially births, marriages, and deaths – you may no longer want a religious ceremony, in a religious building, led by a faith leader. As humanist celebrants, we compose and conduct an appropriate, well structured, and imaginative ceremony by working in partnership with the couple, family or next of kin.
A humanist ceremony will be tailor-made to you and the occasion. It will welcome and respect all the people close to you, including those who have chosen to continue to live within a religious framework.
Cross-culture
I recently conducted a renewal of vows ceremony for a couple who had been married and lived together for six years and had two much loved children. They had become a family together. Her background was Catholic and his, Muslim. They both had residual faith but were, in practice, secular. A humanist ceremony was a safe place as both were included equally and neither background held sway over the over other. Humanist ceremonies can be conducted anywhere that is appropriate, and the identity of the venue need not label the ceremony. It can be as inclusive as the couple want it to be.
Sexuality
The Christian Church, among others, has not been kind to the gay community. The humanist wedding ceremony takes as its heart the tribute, which addresses the story of the couple’s relationship, how they met, discovered they had feelings for one another, realised they were in love and wanted to move to the next step in their relationship. It is, a joyous celebration, both funny and serious, to have in front of a wider gathering.
In this way an LGBT tribute has the same qualities as one for a heterosexual couple. It involves a love story. It is intensely personal and unique to those involved. It is for you and about you.
Disability
A humanist ceremony is moulded around you. It doesn’t come out of a book with all manner of pre-set conditions. It can recognise any disability, multiple disabilities, and absorb them into the ceremony. As you are the heart of the ceremony it can be taken at any pace that is appropriate to you; not so much that horrible word, tolerance, but a celebration of who you are.
The venue and its accessibility, is a choice left entirely up to you. You are not required to work your way into a building that hasn’t been designed with you in mind. You may have friends and family who you would like to participate. Clearly they too may have disabilities which can be embraced into the occasion.
As for building the ceremony I can visit you in your home or near to you to find out exactly what you have in mind and what needs to be taken into consideration. I will listen and combined with my own experience, we can build it together.
The dying
Towards the end of January, Rob emailed me and introduced himself as follows;
“My name is Robert. I’m 54 years of age.
For the past 7 years, I’ve been treated for advanced prostate cancer. I have now come virtually to the end of the available treatments and the prognosis isn’t optimistic. My wife Lysa and I have therefore started to make arrangements accordingly, one of which is, inevitably, a funeral. I have no religious beliefs and no wish for a religious funeral, so I visited Humanists UK….”
and we took it from there.
Over the following six months we met and co-wrote his funeral. Everything was expressed exactly as he wanted. It was a great privilege to be invited into this man’s life. He was devoted to cricket and even when he was quite ill followed the England team all over the world. As his closing music for the funeral he chose ‘Soul Limbo’ (as an atheist, the joke was well made) by Booker T and the MGs – it is the unmistakable soundtrack to Test Match Special. The gathering roared with laughter – which was exactly as he intended.